A parenting evolution

I hate to admit it, but I make assumptions about people based on their appearance all the time. A few weeks ago, I made a new acquaintance who is the father to a college-aged son.

We were talking about our kids and he asked me if I am a strict parent. Judging by his clothes and hairstyle, I assumed that he had not been. So, I shared how at first I had been much authoritarian, valuing discipline more than relationship. Much to my surprise, he chastised me a little , saying that today’s parents are too concerned with being their child’s friend.

While I agree with that, I also have come to believe that while  a disciplinarian style may be effective with some children, there are many children (mine included) that respond to a different approach. In the beginning, I thought I had it all figured out – now I realize that there is no “parenting truth” and that in a few years, I may have revised my approach several times over.

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2 thoughts on “A parenting evolution

  1. Totally agree. We reevaluate periodically over here, too. We want to hold the boys to a high standard on the one hand (because we believe they CAN achieve more and more each year), but on the other hand we want to balance that with grace so that they know they’re always loved and accepted, even when they really mess up. Also we’d like them to look back on their childhood and have great memories, so we don’t want to always “be on them.” But respect is big for us. They’ll be successful everywhere life takes them if they’re generally always respectful of those around them!

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